Dear Readers: This is a timely “oldie but goodie” from our files. Enjoy! Vicki
Dear Vicki: The Fourth of July is coming up and it’s turning into a real challenge for our family. My sixteen-year-old daughter, Joni (who I’m pretty sure is a Fire personality), wants to have a huge picnic, invite all of her friends, and shoot off fireworks after dark (we live where they are legal). Stella, my twelve-year-old, hates noise and crowds so wants a quiet family gathering or maybe even a night at the movies. Of course, Joni claims that would be boring. To make matters worse, Jake, my husband, thinks taking the whole family camping in the wilderness, along with a few close friends, would solve the problem. But I’m the one everyone looks to for organizing and cooking on a camping trip, and it doesn’t sound like fun to me. So, we are a family divided. Any suggestions? Signed, Fractured Family
Dear Fractured Family: Holidays are never easy because everyone has expectations. Of course Joni will want excitement and activity; that’s what Fires need. Plus, the Independence Day holiday occurs during summer, which is Fire’s season. Joni’s personal Fire will likely be revved up even more by summer and she’ll be ready to party.
You don’t mention Stella’s element, but the fact that she wants the quiet and darkness of a movie theater suggests she might be a Water. The yang activity of summer, and especially the noise and excitement of July 4th, are the exact opposite of what Stella’s Water will crave. There’s nothing peaceful, solitary, or quiet about a huge party and fireworks.
Your husband Jake sounds like he might have a lot of Earth. Camping with friends can be very Earth: time out in nature is one of the most important ways to ground and feed Earth energies. Being with close group friends is also important to Earth.
And you, Ms. Fractured Family, are probably a Wood. Making sure everything runs smoothly, whether camping or at home, takes the planning and manifestation skills of a Wood. The good news is that your Wood is exactly what’s needed to solve your family’s July 4th dilemma.
Start by reminding everyone that family life is about compromise, but within the compromise can be nuggets that will meet everyone’s needs. Jake’s Earth and Joni’s Fire value connections. And while Joni will want a larger and crazier party than your husband will, you can use your Wood to create structure and boundaries around how many people are invited to the party you host for July 4th. While camping is important to Earths, being home with close family and friends also matters, so Jake should be equally as happy hosting family and friends at home as he might have been camping in the wilderness.
To meet Joni’s need for a party atmosphere, suggest she invite five or six close girlfriends for a picnic and fireworks celebration outside (weather permitting, of course). As you probably know well, six teenage girls can easily feel like a crazy party, which will...
05 July, 2018